The fish?

So my awesome new book features this baffling conversation:

"So you bait your own hook?"

"Sure. After all, if one can't bait their hook and take the fish off then one can't legitimately say they fish."

"So you use night crawlers too?"

"Those aren't meant for fishing."

"Sure they are. The fish loves them. Don't tell me you're afraid of them?"

OK, first of all, I can't think of a better place to demonstrate when to use their inappropriately. One is undeniably singular. Their is plural. You cannot say one can't bait their hook or one can't say they fish. If you're going to use the singular one, you need to use he or she. In this case, it's a woman, so it should be if one can't bait her hook and one can't say she fishes. 

Second, your character is a linguist. She should know this. 

Third, this is ridiculously sexist. Yes, a single woman who goes fishing can bait her own hook. Stop being an ass.

And then we come to the really baffling part. The fish loves them. I can't even begin to comprehend why this is singular. I guess the only answer is that she is this girl:

That woman's body is mocking me!

Her body was lean and taunt.

So is the body taunting him, or is that a command?

I'm sure she also has curves in all the write places.

Sigh.

Today's book is probably a mystery or something. Pretty sure I'm trying to solve the mystery of what the hell is going on. So far, nothing.

Anyway, I just thought I'd share this because it's so unique.

Her past, like her shadow, was always with her.

Combine that with using smarted as a synonym for said, and basically I hate you.

Welcome back, I guess

I'm about to embark on my first project in over a month. Apparently the author is just as excited as I am because his book title has an exclamation point in it. Seriously. 

So that's kind of a bad sign. Also a bad sign: his biography.

[Author] was born on a dark and stormy, cold and wintry night in1956, the scene fittingly and fleetingly lit by powerful and blinding flashes of Lightning, almost immediately followed by the deafening rapid cannon-fire explosions of Thunder. His sweat soaked and red-faced mother looked down upon her new-born son for the first time with a gentle, smiling and tender look, and then screamed!

I often debate the appropriateness of swearing profusely on my blog because I feel like I should probably be able to come up with more creative ways of expressing myself. But then sometimes this happens.

Fuck. Seriously. Just...fuck.

Phrasing

The NFL may want to think about rephrasing this one, especially with all the backlash over this issue:

Violations regarding assault, battery, domestic violence or sexual assault that involve physical force "will be subject to a suspension without pay of six games for a first offense." 

Of course my first thought was, "When can sexual assault not involve physical force?" Then I was momentarily upset. Then I reread the sentence several times and realized what they mean is this:

Violations that involve physical force, such as assault, battery, domestic violence, or sexual assault, "will be subject to a suspension without pay of six games for a first offense."

That's a bit of a difference.