My productive life

Does anyone find this graph a little depressing?

Perhaps they mean "normal reproductive life" instead of "normal productive life." Or perhaps women stop being productive members of society once they can no longer bear children. 

Time to get a new jab!

Ah, yes. Spelling. The lost art.


Some people say JOB means Just Above Broke. 


Apparently spelling is not required for some people's jobs. Or jabs. Whatever. I tend to use correct spelling for both my job and my jabs at people I encounter in my job. 

I always trust people I don't like

This was a new person, so I have to cut them a little bit of slack. But really, just a little bit. Because honestly, do you not read what you're writing?

Simple Video Tips: The Easiest Way to Achieve the No-Like Trust Factor With Your Clients.

Um, I'm guessing most businesspeople want their clients to like them. Just sayin'. 

Didn't you read my earlier post?

About two hours after I posted yesterday, this came up in my Facebook feed:

Too Faced Cosmetics

‎**CONTEST ALERT** Enter to win 1 of 15 Smokey Eye Gift Sets or the Grand Prize of a $250 eGift Card to TooFaced.com!

Just snap a photo of your sexiest smokey eye look and upload it to the contest page here: http://bit.ly/nOCyiL

The first *DAILY WINNER* will be announced tomorrow! Daily winners receive the new Smokey Eye Collection + Shadow Insurance Eye Shadow Primer + Eye Shadow Brush!!

And yes, if you go to Too Faced's website, they do indeed sell a Smokey Eye Gift Set. I can only assume it makes your eyes look like Smokey the Bear's.

Smoky the Bear

From Urban Decay's Facebook feed today:

Urban Decay Cosmetics

UDers, smoky or smokey? There is a "correct" spelling... Hint: One is the name of the really awesome mascot for the United States Forest Service.


Yes, everyone. A makeup company is irritated at you for spelling "smoky" wrong. I don't even understand why this is an issue. I thought that was one of those common things. We were always taught "Drop the E, add the ___." (-ly, -ed, -whatever). But I guess not everyone was taught that. People talk about doing a "smokey eye" all the time in the world of makeup.

Well, guess what. These people are wrong. WRONG! And apparently Urban Decay wants you to know it. It may be Smokey the Bear and Smokey Robinson, but the adjective is spelled "smoky." So get it right. And probably buy Urban Decay products for all your smoky eye needs or something.

Side note: probably 90% of the makeup I wear is Urban Decay. This pleases me greatly.

That's about what I think of squash too

From a brochure with info on a low-fructose diet:

Squash (this may be troublesome for some; asses individual tolerance)

I guess asses are like snowflakes: every ass is an individual.

Happy Monday!

I just started work on a book project, and the first part of the process is transcribing an interview with the "author." I know this person's name, and I understand how to do a search on the Google. However, he felt it necessary to spell the name of his "idea" four times in the first 1:24 of the file. It's "BEE-ing." Capital "BEE," hyphen, lower case "ing." Should I say it again? I know it's complicated, especially without the internet to help me search for such things. 

Then, when he finally got over spelling his "idea" name, he said this:

"'BEE-ing' (capital B-E-E, hyphen, lower case 'ing') is our play on the word 'being.'"

Oh my god, he's right! "BEE-ing" does sound an awful lot like "being." I never would have noticed that had he not explained it to me! Thank god for this brilliant man and his brilliant ability to brilliantly describe things! 

I really hope this project doesn't continue this way.  

Slow news day, I guess

Here's the main headline from one of our local news affiliates this morning:

Insurer: Car-Deer Collisions In Wis. Dip 1 Percent

A whole 1%? Well, damn. I guess we'd better write an article about such a statistically significant event!